A little Glimpse in the life of Jayden and Me!

nothing.

2009-04-11T00:58:00.000-04:00

silence. drives me insane. so many thoughts and feelings bottled up. only to be released in moments of solitude. holding back tears shadowed by constant fake smiles on my face. how am i? great. thanks. smile. while really i wish i could just hold my gordito and b happy just the 2 of us. i got what i wanted.... right? 2 years... i cried... 2 yrs i sat waiting hoping... but for what? i wish i wouldntve been naive. dreams are just that... dreams. reality is what comes at u. anger. dissappointment. sadness. questions. constant inner monologues driving me insane. silence. one day...

lmao

2009-01-05T23:18:00.002-05:00

idk. i think we like arguing, lol. its always the same shit "u did i did" bullshit, lol. for the past two f-ing years! like for real. its time to get a new hobby =}

on a side note. im glad to be out of gainesville. like for real... i cant believe u let me down. if u saw my face ud know the disappointment i feel right now. like dude. i never ever thought u'd do that out of all people. like damn. idk. i guess its for caring too much, that i let it get to me. when i found out about the other bro and what he did i was like omg and had a headache for like 2 days and whenever i thought about it. but now im like damn wtf is everyone thinking up there. idont even know.

heres another reason to be thankful for J. bc i live for him more or less, ive been able to not get into a meaningless relationship again, which means no new "kidney infection" like my bro jokes, and no more putting my goals on hold.

reflection

2009-01-02T00:42:00.002-05:00

this yr was full of ups and downs.

things i loved and happy about:
1. Jayden growing and developing so much. He's talking and Walking and Running, and dancing and singing and I've been so blessed, hes so sweet, and so smart, and so loving! idk. I'm glad hes the way he is, he makes everything no matter how tough or how much im not feeling this situation, he makes everything even a little better!
2. Realizing like the dumbass I am, that the family I have always wanted was right in front of me and that I took them for granted! This year its all about us and being there for each other and just me trying hard to be a great daughter, sister and mother!
3. working with 3 yr olds! They are a lot of fun. and I truly enjoy seeing them learn and think its so cool!
4. web calls! as lame as it is, its so cool to be able to actually talk to my family. So far we've done it with Jackie, Nestor and his fam, my grandparents (dad), and Mongo (although it was 1-way)
5. Medellin Restaurant... we're going to be positive and our dreams are coming together to make the BEST Colombian Fusion Cusine!
6. My friends that I still keep in touch with (no particular order). Gillian (going to isreal soon, as if doing her Masters wasnt fantastic enough, now shes going to try to get her PhD), Nati (finally finding someone who treats her right and doing big things in school!), Tanuska (although things have been hard, shes not given up and kept the faith! things must go up for them!!! and she moved down to miami and I FINALLY was able to visit) Mike (doing big things being a daddy! It was Marley's birth and his first everythings! Although he told me hes going through Drama. Thats what Gville is all about. its like highschool bc everyone knows each other. GET OUT of that city!) David (still in school, going strong and working, and im glad i get to see him every little chance we get. he's like my little reminder of normalcy) Allison (so she ended up not coming down to MIA, but shes starting school in Daytona!!) Papa Frita! (though in Otown i still have tons of love for her! i miss her greatly. shes one of those friends taht can tell whats the deal and instead of like inquiring, shes more like f-it, lets party and makes me smile, lol) Em and Dora (totally miss these girls, weve gotten apart a lot! sucks, but we gotta do something bout that in 09. no matter what though, they my ride or die!) Lots of aquaintances graduated, are doing the grown thing moving around the US (secretly im jealous, i wont lie. i'd love to be anywhere near done so my mama can be proud! and hell, so i can be proud too)
7. Excuse my french. but being done with the bullshit!!! theres nothing better, than knowing! i'm free and although it may be hard, im going to do me and live my life with my son how i want it =} i dont care if im alone forever but ill take that over ur games anytime mr. sperm donor, lol.
and for the best
8. My momma dukes... strongest woman ever! best mother ever! great friend! can read me almost best. but by far the most wonderful grandmother!!! I love u mami! ni tengo palabras para describirte y nuestra relacion. we fight and argue like no other, but i dont think i could love u more!!!! y lo siento por las mil veces que te trato mal. no lo mereces!
9. My pa. a kid at heart. a loving father (i dont get too many i loves u from him, but he shows it with our inside jokes, lol)Makes the best lunches for me and J! and has a wonderful grandpa/grandson relationship which is awesome to look at and something which they totally only understand b/w them, lol. I know the restaurant will go well. bc just like hes a great man. hhes an even greater and harder worker!!!
10. BA!!!!!!!!!!!! ILOVE U LIKE CRAZY bro! without u, id probably be God knows where! my rock, u keep me up ur just great i cnat even explain. and if its not enough with u loving me tons and being a super brother. ur uncle/godfather skills are freaking out of this world. I get jealous when J is crying or when he wakes up, going BA! lol. He loves u so much! and u him. its insane! i love u tons, even when u teach him PING!!! with the christmas tree lol.

ok, so now on to things that are going to get better... hopefully!
1. guys... they are so lame. i dont have time for lame excuses. Un mentiroso cae mas rapido que un cojo, and its tru. dont waste ur time on lies. i decided, i need someone collected and preferably latino =} and having their life somewhat straight, with goals and aspirations! preferably with a tan and one that likes to wear cologne and dress nice, lol.
2. work... pay sucks. i gotta do something about that. im taking a course so hopefully i can get a better raise... but we'll see whats up! if not, i gotta leave!
3. school... IT NEEDS TO BECOME A PRIORITY! even if i gotta beg or go up and reak havic on people i need to get this on point!!!!! i dont even care anymore what major, what school or nothing. somethings gotta give!
4. me! in general i need to start loving and dealing with what i got and do something about what i dont like. forget others. its about me and my loved ones.
5. stop torturing myself w/ curiosity. be done w/ it!!! lol. yeah like that'll happen my chismosa self! w/e ill stop caring or wasting my time, lol.

anyways... its so past my bed time!!! lol.

its the little moments that

2008-12-28T22:05:00.001-05:00

its the little moments that make it all worth it! Jayden told me "i... yuu" after i told him "i love you"!

feliz navidad #2

2008-12-25T23:03:00.000-05:00

its my second christmas with my gordiflojo! it was cute. we got together with the gellman boys. all 3 of them and bailey roberts new puppy. jeffrey and tia carmen and jackie (live from canada). it was great we havent all been together (sort of0 since a long time! j napped and woke up just intime to play with everyone a lil and wait till baby jesus and santa bring presents. he loved the tonka trucks the boys brought him! he also loved the tails book jeffrey got him. we love to read him books and he loves reading them too. he got clothes and and a cool millipede (its really a 52pede bc its an abc one) and he finally got a lil radiolike my mom has always wanted him to have!
j also ate an empanada for the 1st time ever! and of course we made arts and crafts lol we didnt bake for xmas but thats bc we had a cookie decoarating evening on a previous night lol. today we had tamales for breakfast. played with presents hung out with eachother. napped!! and watched wall.e
anyways happy holidays

For the good stuff.... CHRISTMAS!!!

2008-12-21T15:24:00.002-05:00

ok so its the 21st. happy belated to me and happy birthday to my alita del alma. i still love u! and what madrina said is true. i gave u a negrita when i was little and god gave me my negrito lindo!

its that time of the yr and J is also 18 months old!!! hes ancient. but he's great. hes so smart and charming. looks like me, lol. and hes such a personality. i love him!!! he really likes christmas, the decorations, the tree, the songs, the novena, and the lights. its spectacular.

he's grown so much. he sings, he dances, he claps, hes tryting to talk a mile a minute, but we dont understand chinese we tell him, lol.

his favorite songs right now:
Most things canti juegos... he got over his pocoyo stage

I like to Move it Move it

"where is santa, where is santa
here i am, here i am
marry merry christmas, merry merry christmas
ho ho ho, ho ho ho" (and in spanish)

"ven, ven, ven,
ven a nuestras almas jesus ven, ven, ven, ven,
ven a nuestras almas
jesus ven ven a nuestras almas
no tardes tanto, no tardes tanto
jesus ven ven, ven ven"

new words:
"mana" snowman
"ahol" arbol
"I-ah" tia
"yayis" his name for grandma
"gon gon" dragon

favorite movie: madagascar!!!
he hasnt watched it yet, but J loves Wall.E anywhere he sees it that what he calls out to. Shhh dont tell him, el nino jesus is bringing it for him (and for David, lol)

he still LOVES animals, but he is starting to like transportation. such as airplane, trucks, helicopter, firetrucks, and motorcycles.

his favorite person that he calls out for (aside from me, lol) is BA! David is still the greatest with him! i dont know what Id do without my brother. i think all single mothers, aside from having a great family should have a great Big brother and godfather to their children. David is like my savior at time... i guess tahts why hes my best friend. corny i know but i loves him i think more than j loves him, but thats debateable.

Anyways, happy holidays and a happy and prosperous new year. My wish is for Medellin restaurant to finally open, and open BIG! and for all of us to get our dreams fullfilled. whats my dream.... FOr J and I to succeed the utmost we can. Together, whether it be just the 2 of us for ever, or if im destined to meet someone new... i think i want a nice latin man =}

i should've known. VENTING!

2008-12-21T15:07:00.003-05:00

this is what i learn in school. people who come from families that didnt grow up together, grow up to not really know what a real family is like. but i guess theres nothing like first hand experience. Now I know.

im kinda happy the way things turned out. i know how things are now. at least i know for sure that its OVER! but im not sad. more like irritated, bc i was hesitant to try this again, and when i finally fell for it, its over. it feels like it was just a game. w/e thats what i get for having dated someone so young while i myself was young too.

I would say im not angry. well, that would be a lie. im angry that i was lied to, for no reason. i wouldve been ok with having been told the truth. but no. i think its a cowardly move. people dont just pop up from nowhere as he said in the aftermath. the lack of acceptance for his mistakes is what has turned this into a "shitty"situation.

But i can honestly say i am happy that i can move on and say that i tried. what i was told were problems b4 i tried to fix. i tried going above and beyond, i asked i wanted to know how i could become a better wife. but w/e. i tried. i didnt give up. when j grows up, he wont be able to say its my fault.

Hopefully when J grows up i'll find a great daddy for him, but not only that... he'll be a great husband for me. I'm also a little relieved. bc i HATE the name maria for a daughter, being hispanic its EVERYWHERE.

w/e lifes a bitch and i do believe in Karma. so shit happens. wait for ur turn buddy.

edited after the initial angryness, lol.

why?

2008-12-13T09:38:00.002-05:00

u gotta love fb, lol. not. everyone i know is moving on with life. graduating, moving on with a masters, getting a good job, or even getting married and having a family.

me i stay stuck. im working where i worked when i was 16, lol. i live with myparents. and yeah my education is w/e?

but worst off im still stuck on the same person. and it just seems like the same fucking cycle. one day we're hot, then we're cold. u seem to never be the person that will help me get out of this rut that will push me to better myself that will help me make a family. thats all i want. i dont want to be stuck anymore.

2008-11-18T22:53:00.001-05:00

when we found out i was pregnant. u promised ud be there for the baby and me. that wed b a family and that ud be there. that didnt go smoothly. the night before labor at the top of the stadium u promised wed be ok. wrong again. why should i trust or believe u this time when time after time that u say u want to be with us something or someone comes up. im tired of being sad. tired of being let down. i no longer trust anyone thanks to u. and frankly i dont feel like being let down. so i question myself each day with why i am doing this if its the best thing to do and what will happen when it all goes to shit again? this time i need more than just words... but just exactly what am i looking for? idk.

a historic outcome to the 2008 elections

2008-11-05T20:44:00.001-05:00

ok. u know i have been very uninformed for the elecrions sort of till last minute. i asked david and he said to look at topics that were important to me. i looked at healthcare for one. obamas plan was my choice. but my point today is that im kind of annoyed by the txts ive been getting about obama winning. the all are directed art him winning and how its a greatr thing bc hes black. yes i do understand that this means a sense of hope and accomplishment for the black community and all races .that anypne can do what they set their mind to. that there is no longer a race barrirer. but.... the issue io am having now is did many of these obama voters go out and vote based on ideals and platforms where the candidate stood and their plans to better america and ourselves or was it just based on skin tone?
another thing people who were so open minded on chosing a president wwere still so closed minded on the state of marriage.

October 08

2008-11-05T09:44:00.000-05:00

wow its been some time now. october came and went. and i must say it was a fun month minus the rain. we made lots of decorations for halloween. it was fun bc j liked them and no matter how many times hed seen them. he still seemed exciter when he looked at them.
we were able to do things on the weekend such as going to the park and even the pool once. but my dad is right the weather is no longer pool weather... major bummer. we were able to go to the pumpkin patch as a family again. it took j some warming up. then he liked all the pumpkins! lol. we got 2. a big one to carve and a little one to paint.
then came the best part.... the zoo!! we wanteed to go to boo at the zoo but i had a workshop and we were supposed to have a picnic so david and i went on a friday. it was grea j loved it and it was great exercise for us lol. we took lots of good pics and j likes to relive his trip by looking at his photo album. tio ba was the best. we had fun. next time wed go a little earlier and make it an all day thing so to not rush and also bring water clothes bc they habe a water area.
halloween was a blast, well halloween day, not night. during the day discovery had a halloween party for the children. they got to dress up and trick or treat around the classrooms. jayden loved it. he was a lion. tio ba came too. have i mentioned hes the best!!!! at night not only was it raining but j was sick ={. That night keith came down. it was a good weekend. then J got sick again, lol. what am i going to do with my poor gordo. anyways tata for now

halo halo halo!!!

2008-10-18T21:00:00.000-04:00

today was a fun busy day. i told myself if j wasnt sick and its not rainy wed have fun. we woke up went to the park. hot as could be! then david took j to the library and ran errandds with him while i babysat. he fell asleep bc he was pooped from the park. then j dressed up in his lion suit for a lil bit then it was family time at the pumpkin patch. it took j a lil bit to warm up but then he liked it. we then all went to medellin together. we took a family pic in the first stage of construction. how exciting that we r going to get to see it form into a restaurant from scratch!!!! just as i thought j had fun playing there. in the picture he's yelling to hear his echo. well he's trying to copy me lol. it was fun goofying off day!

thank u.

2008-10-13T20:47:00.001-04:00

ur all i have. the only 1 who can make me genuinely smile now. i hate it when u are sick wish i could make all the ickiness dissappear even if i have to take it all in. i hope u talk soon so u can describe how u feel and how i can help u feel better. but that doesnt mean grow up soon. in fact take ur time i want to keep u little and hold u in my arms as long as i can!

hows life.... it sucks. thanks for asking

2008-10-13T20:39:00.001-04:00

you say i have no self esteem thst i walk around with my head down ashemed and disgusted at my life the choices ive made how i look how i feel. well u know what u dont help. u do nothing but nag and criticize either with words or looks fo disgust of pity i can tell inside ur calling me a failure ur calling me fat. not a week csn go past that u are not reminding me of the mistakes ive made. u think ur words dont hurt. they do. i hate u. u may love my son like crazy and he may love u but u have not been able to help me by just loving and accepting me for the fuck up ive become. u cant stop judging to realize for one second how u make me feel. id wish nothing more to be free but im deathly afraid to prove u right again and fail not only for myself but for jayden. i never want him to feel like me stuck in a rut bc no matter what i do even when things are looking better. life comes and
slaps me in the face just to rewmind me it sucks.

life... stick it in your juicebox and suck it.

2008-10-11T21:05:00.000-04:00

no estoy contenta como me veo pero tampoco siento ninguna razon de cambiar y mejorar. creo que devardad me e dado por vencida. no me aliso el pelo casi nunca. porque para que si despues me lo pongo en una cola y se jodio todo el trabajo de alizarlo. no me visto bien porque nada se me ve bien pero no quiero comprar ropa nueva porque no quiero quedar haci de gorda pero tampoco hago nada para cambiar. y hoy despues de que se me rompiera un lente decidi que voy a usar gafas embez de lentes. nunca me han gustado las gafas y no es q me gusten pero yo no pagare toda esa plata para un examen mas lentes. no me importa no veo a nadie excepto a mi familia y a un monton de peladitos diario. todo esto es un ciclo vicioso. no me importa verme dejada porque no me siento contenta y me siento haci por muchas razones. el autoestima en el piso. mi futuro tres pies bajo tierra. mi mente en overdrive
negativo y aunque trato no pudo empujar las malas memorias recuerdos o pensamientos nublando mi mente.

2008-10-10T21:50:00.000-04:00

J has such a cute smile and happy and loving persona that i capture in great pics on my phone but it cant be captured by photographers when theres backgrounds and a flash. his 1 yr pics were crazyness. j wouldnt smile he wouldnt evem do anyrhing but the frown face. for halloween pics he wouldnt grrr like a lion... he grrrs all the time lol. then i got his 1st preschool pics and lets just say the previous are masterpieces in comparison to these lol. they just do too many cheesy things. a simple say cheese gets him smiling lol not an im gonna get u in a ccheesy voice. idk. mom says its ok she loves it. she loves it all though as long as its j related. i like the pics but i kind of want to do retakes especially since pic day was only like 3 weeks into the school yr thats when j was still crying when i dropped him off. u know i might just keep thim hes my lil gordo and ill have his genuine
laughter and smile to remember

2008-09-16T22:40:00.000-04:00

J is adorable if hes not singing songs with me or making the funniest faces in the mirror while i rive he is reading books and he really passes each page and since he loves animals he makes the animal sound as he passes the page.... hes super entertaining!!

Happy anniversary to me lol

2008-09-09T21:36:00.001-04:00

Its been exactly one year (well and some hours to be exact) since he officially broke up with me after our millions of times angry breaking up and going back out the next day lol. after this hed always be hot or cold about being with us i still dont know why or what made him feel which way and why it would change with no warning
I can remember i was talking to him about how wed just gone to take js three month pics and just like that he told me had talked to some uncle who was all into god and gave him advice and he told me i wasnt trying hard enough that he wasnt doing long distance and that i didnt call anymore. Well id like to tell that uncle fuck u from the bottom of my heart. Lol ps where did this uncle come from id never even heard of him. He didnt even know me.
its so sad i remember this date its also very wierd that he txt me hey today and we talked like it was normal but i doubt he remembers or even thinks anything of it. He didnt remember our going out anniversary eVer.

Look who's walking!!!!!

2008-09-07T22:16:00.000-04:00

I couldn't be more proud of j!!!!! He's been walking much more and he'd do some solitos in verizon but today he officially walked all by himself!!! Ms shirley said any time now and ms judy had said if we push him that he do it this weekend and he did but the best part is that he knows he did it!!!! he has a huge smile and he claps for himself omg im so proud and so happy! It was funny too bc he was so sleepy and went upstairs with tio ba and abuelita to shower. When they got him to walk he didn't want to stop lol. David has taught him to clap and now to walk i knew he would bc j loves him so much and copies him in almost everything

I'm so Proud of him :-)

2008-09-07T09:34:00.001-04:00

He'S eating by himself. Making a mess but doing it on his own!

Emotions or whatever suck!

2008-09-03T21:46:00.001-04:00

Ok so when i get sad i think a lot so much that it bothers my sleep. But the problem is that i always dwell on things that make me unhappy. Things that make me sad then i mentally self mutilate myself just reminding myself of everything thats bad and horrible. But i don't know how to turn my mind off i don't know how to give myself any confidence any positive self esteem then i tend to curry myself deeper by hating me my body my personality my life everything except for jayden i isolate myself from people from surroundings from even just leaving my house. Its been those type of days lately. I know hate is a strong word but i hate me i hate my life. It'll pass i know it will till then i just hope i dry out so i can never cry again one day.

Interesting

2008-09-01T21:28:00.000-04:00

J did the coolest thing at least it is to me. Yesterday we were watching home videos and it was him riding his tonka truck. He goes away from the living room and by himself pulls out his truck and manuvers it to the living room and proceeds to play with it and says nothing to us. Idk maybe u just had to be there. Then this morning we are sitting together watching the lion king which i was excited about bc i saw that while pregnant and he kicked like crazy! Anyway so i'm wearing a gator shirt, j points at the gator like always except this time he gets off the couch cruises and crawls over to his toy shelfish and gets albert and starts pointing at his head. He then rips it apart and tries to put it together but thats a different story. Lastly tonight david gives him an old Bulls pencil and he grips it tight then i play on you tube the old bulls intro music back when they had pippen and
jordan and he keeps pointing at the computer and accu at the pencil. Its retarded but its neat to me

Do You know the Muffin Man?

2008-08-31T08:04:00.002-04:00

Ok, so J had 2 last great days at preschool. NOt only did I peak in, but everyone told me also. on thursday he learned the hokey pokey and we sang it at home and he got all excited. Friday Ms Judy told me he liked the muffin man song. And yes he does, he even does a little hand motion for it. very cute! I think it also helped that these 2 days he's most over his cold/sinus/ ear infection. Of course he had to get something his first week of pre-school, but that was expected... i just didnt expect it so soon!!!!

But the BEST news of all is that Thursday my lil Gordo walked by himself a couple steps!!! I'm so excited =] Everyone says hold off on him walking bc he'll get into everything fast! and basing it on J's curious personality (well i think most babies) I believe it, but w/e he'll be walking!!!!! FINALLY.

Message for J

2008-08-23T22:37:00.000-04:00

i love u so much! I'm not going to lie my life changed drastically since i knew u were in my tummy. There were many times these past 2 years that i have felt sacred lost and confused but just one of your smiles your hugs and kisses or the sound of your laughter makes me so happy and makes me know we will be alright. I love you in a way that supersedes anything i've ever felt and i promise to never give up and to always put you first and give you the world. "you are my sunshine my only sunshine you make me happy when skies are grey you'll always know J how much i love you no one can take my sunshine away"

Agh i need a new

2008-08-20T21:49:00.001-04:00

Agh i need a new phone! I wrote a post twice and this thing keeps dying on me at the last sentence. Of course it works this time around. AGH!

1st day!!!!

2008-08-18T14:54:00.004-04:00

First day is over!

My mom and bro went with me. Getting out of the car he had an excited smile and he even shrieked and waived his arms like when he sees something he likes! J and I said our goodbyes before entering and then when we got in I put him by a toy and he seemed fine. Ms Judy picked him up, we said goodbyes again and she took him to wash his hands as we exited. I was lucky I had to go to work and could not stay by the window watching, because I'm sure I would have. My family said that he came out was playing by a toy and then started crying once he looked around and we were not there. My poor gordito. They stayed and watched him for a long time to make sure he was ok. He eventually stopped crying, he had a little crying buddy too. That's because most of the children had been there in the summer and the two boys had not. Since there is a hurricane coming there were like no children there so we got sent home early! I didnt want to cut J's day off but I was able to peek at what he was doing and continue to do things in the room. He ate snack just fine. they have the cutest littlest chairs! He was playing and dancing by himself but he was happy and then lunch time came around and he ate almost all his food and was still happy. Since I wasn't going to be there all day, I picked him up early and he came to play in my room where he also had a blast! Plus it was a good way to wait out the rain.

Twas the night before the First day of school...

2008-08-17T21:44:00.000-04:00

And all through the house everyone was super excited for j's first day of school!! His orientation yesterday went well he was comfortable enough to go off and play while turning back to make sure his abuela and tÃo ba where there. I had mine at the same time so i couldn't go. I'm excited bc he had a home first impression and experience i'm hoping for the best tomorrow!! Tonight i packed his lunch with comfort foods with my dads help incase he's too upset hopefully he'll eat his queso at least. I set aside his outfit and his tÃo helped me iron it. And abuela has to work tonight but she said she wanted to also bring him to school! How cute is my family!!! I'm excited and nervous but thank God i'm sleepy lol good night

My little baby is going to preschool!!

2008-08-12T22:29:00.000-04:00

Ok so its 5 days till j starts school and i'm totally getting butterflies in my tummy and i am having second thoughts... I know it'll be ok. His teacher is great and that he'll have fun and get to socialize but i'm so nervous. He doesn't want to walk yet he doesn't talk how is he going to get what he wants he's going to be frustrated and he's going to be away from his mama his ague his abuela and his tio ba. he's going to cry. I'm going to cry. I'll be near him but unfortunately i can't be looking in the whole time. Ahh i totally feel like i'm freaking out. Oosa... Ok why all of a sudden? I was fine when i paid his tuition and i was even excited preparing his school things why am i freaking out now? What am i going to feed him? lol more like what am i going to send to feed him?! Ahh! Major ahh!

Cheeser face!

2008-08-07T21:49:00.000-04:00

Although sometimes i feel so angry and disgusted and demoralized with my life my lil gordo makes me smile. Since day one he's been the best to be at my side. He knows exactly what days to have major mamitis and be extra loving. What days to fill me up with hugs and sloppy kisses and what days to make me crack up! He's great and i hope that he always remains MY major mamas boy and that he helps fill my life with his super enjoyable and contagious laughter!!!

Blah Blah Blah

2008-07-28T18:52:00.002-04:00

ok, so maybe bringing a computer to class was NOT a good idea, I dont think i wouldve used it during class, but I also forgot a pen, lol...

on the bright side, i can update my blog, lol.

lets see.... nothing really.

Personally, ive had a lot on my mind. not really something i want to share, but confusion is the major defining word these days. and oh yes... boys suck through pineapples at them, they have sharp edges. lol

I am almost done with my second summer term, and i think i am doing well =] i'm excited and kind of sad. Sad to be going back to work full time this summer. And bummed, out to not be a student. Although it's not as if I am having a blast, I rather enjoy the little escape to being a student again. Plus I like my classes on Social Work. But life goes on. Next summer I will attempt to be a full time student again....

I have gone back to work, making Gordito time much less. boo. hes so funny, and its so wierd how much he loves me. Its something I totally cant understand. even when I put him in timeout for bitting me, he still wants to be with me after i take him out of the playpen. He'll be crying, and u can tell he's upset, but he still clings on to me. When I am mad, I never want to be with the person who made me mad. Strange.
So next year I will be going to that "baby" building to work, although I will have older children. It's cool because I will be near my Gordito... bc incase I havent said before, J is starting pre-school in the fall.
I am super nervous, yet very excited. Today, Poor Ms. Judy, I totally bombarded her with wierd issues on nap mats, food, onesies, lol. She was such a trooper, she even stopped what she was doing to sit down with me and talk about my worries and calm me some. I am very excited, though, the little ones were napping so peacefully and there was one little girl who woke up and she was totally cheesing! =D

On Family life, mom just came back from Colombia. It was Grandma's 1 year anniversary of having passed away. David made this kickass video which totally made me cry and it made me remember her, I still dont think I can imagine going to Colombia and not seeing her anymore. Kind of makes me not want to go to Colombia. But then, I want to go to Colombia so Jayden can see colombia, plus theres tons of little babies for him to play with (too ba most are girls). But issues with Mom and I picked right back up where they were when she left. I always seem to be doing something wrong in her eyes. It's very stressful and annoying, and disheartening. I think I try to be a good mom and daughter, but I guess I'm not trying hard enough. Things with my dad are good, he seems to be having more fun with me hanging out around the house, lol. I'm still fat in his eyes, but w/e i dont care anymore. I do, but I tell myself I don't. David seems to be distant. He's got a lot on his head with the restaurant. but i hate that he doesnt open up to somebody and instead he takes it all in. I wonder if there is something else bothering him... i believe there is, but he'll never tell me.

AT THE END OF THE DAY.... GRRRR this class could be so interesting, but this professor or the 3 hour block is just not doing it for me

Adios!

Play time

2008-07-10T17:01:00.001-04:00

I love playing with j now much more than before. Now his actions seem more driven by an actual purpose. He also uses the toys more correctly. Finally he's been actually helping me build with his legos than just waiting and knocking it over. And just recently he's discovered cars! I think bc my dad has toy cars at his desk where j likes to play plus so does david in his room i have a large one in my room and he has some in his toy box. Easy to say they are everywhere and accessible. Now when he gets a car he goes broom broom and actually moves it around at times laying on his tummy. He also uses the cars to crash down my tunnels i don't understand the fascination with knocking things down and breaking stuff! I should video tape him and ask him later to see what he says. Anywho... Good night!

Mid Summer

2008-06-26T11:06:00.002-04:00

So Summer A has finished and I received my grades!!! I'm so excited because I got an A- and a B+ on my SW courses =] I got a C+ in English, but i'm ok w/ that I hated the course and the teacher too. she didn't like me much either, so w/e. I'm glad I id well, and I know I probably could've gotten an A in the child welfare class, I just didn't try as hard. I have a second chance to redeem myself though, I'm taking Vulnerable Children with the same professor this term. I think I'm going to try to register for 1 class for the fall to keep on track, but idk... we'll see.

I look at j and

2008-06-24T08:53:00.000-04:00

I look at j and he's the best. Sweet. Loving. Happy. Funny. Cute. Then i wonder why someone doesn't try harder.

Mixed thoughts

2008-06-13T16:46:00.003-04:00

Yesterday was Chrissy's viewing. How strange. I still can't believe it. What everyone said was true. She was someone that was so full of life. Always cheesing... HARD, lol. Ready for anything. But now she's gone. She was a year older than me. I remember first meeting her at DPC and our talks during nap time. Then I remember how we randomly met up again when I was still in H.S. I couldn't believe it was her then, pregnant, Lunel's girl, and I definitely can't believe it was her that Emely was telling me about when she called me saturday morning as I was driving up.

I see J and I can't even imagine to think what she felt during her last moments, I feel for Lunel b/c he has to explain to Q that mommy isn't coming back. I hope he steps up, and I think he will, at least I pray he will, for he has to love Q not only as much as he does now but a million times more to even relate to the love /chrissy had for Q. I know she's better now and she'll watch over her son better this way. But It's still shocking. She was only 23....

Day 2 of Jayden's B-day Extravaganza (lol)

2008-06-09T16:17:00.000-04:00

After having been on the phone numerous times.. FINALLY David and I landed reservations to a character breakfast!!! One of the moms at DPC recomended it to me, but I thought so have all the other people when I made reservations (and edited them). She definitely sold it to me though when she showed me pictures and when she told me of her experience! Too Cute!

So we headed out super early to the Beach Resort where we had a breakfast reserved a 7:30am for J's birthday at Cafe May! It was a buffet (the food wasnt great for me, but thats because I don't really like breakfast foods except for sunny side up eggs and hashbrowns), I think everyone else enjoyed it. I know Jayden did. They even had Mickey waffles, lol. Too bad, now that I think about it, I didnt take a picture! Boo. Well the characters that were there to great Jayden were Goofey, Chip and Dale (I can't tell who's who, I know one has a red nose and the other a black one) and Minney! I think J's favorite was Minney. J definitely loves the girls, and he's such a flirt that they love him. I can't wait for his girls have cooties stage, lol.

Off to the Magic Kingdom!!!

We got to the Magic Kingdom on the bus. David and I wanted to go on the MonoRail and/or the Boat taxi, but the transportation from the resort was a bus. Still retty cool because we didn't have to move the car to go anywhere. Our first ride was the Tigger and Pooh ride. We thought Jayden would love it because he can point out to Tigger and Pooh (especially on his bibs) but the ride went really fast, still he was fascinated looking at all the bright colors. Next we went on the PeterPan Ride. David and I sat together and pretended to be pirates...Arghhh (We got a good picture), then we wondered why we were trying to be pirates when peterpan is about young kids?.... but it's not our fault, those are the seats they put us in. Then we went on It's a Small World. I thought this for sure was going to be Jayden's favorite ride! But there was so many things going on, all the different people and characters moving, so Jayden was amazed looking from one side to another, so as to not miss a thing! It wasn't really until the end when it was moving slowly while people got off that he was able to listen to the song and bob his head. This is where Keith and Mike joined us... sort of. [It may have been different if Keith was alone because they hung to the back for the most part making it awkward for me because I didn't know where to go, either the front where David was leading the pack, the middle with my parents, or the back. It is very hard to please anyone! But this trip was not about me, so to continue] Next was Dumbo, and if I do say so myself... this ride was awful! LONGEST LINE for like two minutes none of which J actually seemed to like.

Then we went to the PHILLARMAGIC! THis by far was the best ride for J and it wasnt even a ride, lol. HE LOVED IT! (I dont think I can bold it enough) He kept the 3-D glasses on and sang along when it was music, flinched when things seemed to be thrown at the audience, ad grasped on tightly to me when he got startled by noise from the film. I think after this we had lunch. We then went to the Judge's tent and to Mickey's country house to meet Mickey! It was such a long line, but finally we got to Mickey and Minnie. Cute pictures - personally I think David took better ones than the professional. O yes, by this time we are all super pooped! It was sooooo HOT! We went next to Donald's boat, where J cooled off (me too) with the water fun. He loves the water, I think if it was up to him, he'd still be playing at the hotel's pool! Then we went to go see PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN! but BOOO it was still closed! Grrr Matey. So we went to the enchanted Tiki Room. Jayden liked it too and there was A/C =]

After this, we decided to head back to the hotel and use the pool. We could go and then come back for the parade and the fireworks, but they told us they were going to check for room keys, so Keith and Mike couldn't do the same.

J finally took a nap! A VERY LONG NAP, and he actually missed some of the night parade, but I video taped it for him... which reminds me I think we should sit down and watch it soon. But he woke up for the fireworks and he liked them very much pointing to them as they went up in the sky!

That night we all CRASHED into our beds.

Next year I think EPCOT would do nicely! and during the week, but even better if I can give Jayden a birthday pass but for 09/06/2009, because it is really hot in June!!!!!! lol.

Day one down... Bigger day tomorrow!!

2008-06-08T00:10:00.001-04:00

Theres so much to say about today! Our trip to orlando was great! J sang. He napped. And we got here which seemed eternal!! The allstar resort is really nice. We checked in and went straight for the pool. The best part was the kiddie pool j loved it and seeing other children around he was trying to walk more and even stood balanced for some time! Walking is near!! Then downtown disney where j found a new love... Mickey! Magic kingdom awaits us tomorrow morning... Can't wait!!

One more day...

2008-06-06T07:47:00.001-04:00

Till orlando them disney!! Two more days till j turns one!!! I'm so excited but i'm so nervous bc we haven't packed yet :/ gotta get to it. Adios

1 week! + RANDOMNESS (always)

2008-06-02T00:38:00.002-04:00

1 week officially till J turns one!!!! I'm so excited my Gordito is growing up (tear - no david, not really, lol) but I am so excited, this has been a year full of ups and downs for me emotionally but Jayden and I couldn't have done it with out la ITA, el AGUE and that Tio Baluga! I'm excited for our first family trip to disney in a while! We used to go a lot when we were younger, but with everyone going off to school it wasn't so easy to do it anymore. I, along with David, am getting more knowledgeable about the park and things to do that will be Jayden friendly, lol. I ask everyone I meet with children and David of course reads, lol. He's the book worm of the two of us! Everything is set, we have a semi itinarary, and a list of things to pack, now to get the bag down from the attic. lol. anyways im just too excited for words, and noticing by J's reaction to the disney store, lol I hope and truly believe he's going to LOVE IT! well at least like it as much, lol. No high expectations there as long as he is just as happy there as he is here, and thats hard to do, b/c that little gordo has a huge smile like 23/7 and that's even including sleeping! lol. He still from time to time smiles in his dreams, i love it. =]

There's nothing greater than having the weekends all to myself with J, well the family too, lol but yeah since they get to spend the most time with him m-f while i'm at work and school, i'm greedy and claim the weekends! We wake up early, hang out, play with everything i can find! sing songs, practice walking, go to the playground, play in the sand (accomplishment for today... he did not attempt to eat the sand, lol), go on errands, read books -J LOVES BOOKS!

J is also developing even more of a personality! He choses what he wants to eat and what he doesn't. He is extra persistent when it comes to using a fork and a spoon. Good and bad, good because he's learning, bad because he only wants to feed himself and he gets aggrevated! I will admit, I have little luck with feeding him at times. I have no problem when it's just the two of us, but when he knows there are other people around he takes advantage of making me look bad, lol. When we are alone though he eats super well. I dont know how to explain it, but it's like we do it slowly and with less importance on having to eat, and he actually eats.

On a random side note, I want to go back to church I think... but not St. Andrews, I had a bad experience there and was totally turned off, but at times I think I should go back, not only for me, but for J. I think he needs it, to grow up where there is faith and not this sense of hopelessness i sometimes feel. IDK? I might adventure to the one by parkland or St Elizabeth. 1 because they are the closest ones, and two I heard good things about the parkland one. I tried St. Elizabeth once, but I dont remember why we never went back.

On another sidenote... 1 week till my 1 year mark of nursing J! I am very surprised I've been able to make it this far. With work, especially when they started not giving us lunches, I figured my BF days were done. but nope, 1 more week. I know I'm supposed to start weaning him instead of just going cold turkey, but I think I'll do it after our disney trip and once work is done for the school year so I can not worry so much about sleep at night. Plus I think once I get the hang of school with no DPC I am going to go back to working at the restaurant, I need to have some type of income for the next 3 months!

On a personal side note, i have big decisions to make within a week. I can't postpone them forever, I need to make up my mind, and stop with the what ifs, stop with the feeling bad and the worrying, because things will be the way they will be. I'm hoping for the better, but they may get for the worse in one aspect.

My mom is going to Colombia! I wish J and I could go with her. First, J doesnt have a passport, thanks to his father, and two, when she is going I can't go because of school. I would love to take J! I think it would be... interesting. And I know my mom is also not going to have her mind at ease not being with J! Hopefully one day when he's not too old to appreciate family!

Discoveries!

2008-05-25T21:34:00.002-04:00

OK, so I am loving this weekend time with J! I have so much fun with him!!!

1. No he goes boom boom =] lol. i dont know where i got the song that goes "boom boom boom i want u in my room" so i sing the boom boom boom part to him and he goes boomboom!! i love it =]]

2. J likes playing in the sand! but he also likes to eat it and gets pissy if u tell him not to!

3. POCOYO!!!!!!!!!

This is the cutest cartoon I think!

4. J is a blast to go shopping with! He gets all excited and points out things he likes. But a good part is he's got a short term memory so he forgets about one thing fast when he sees another, lol.

5.GOING TO DISNEY IN 13 days!

6 J IS GOING TO BE 1 in 15 days. Which means time to try strawberries, peanut butter, and bes of all, to turn the car seat around to face forward!!!

The heat is ridiculous though

2008-05-21T19:46:00.002-04:00

As i wall to my car from class this is my only reminder of the uf campus. Of the ville in general. This big used with moss hanging down. Then i look to the right and left and i see palm trees. Lol. The school.s are so different in structure not only the outside construction but the classrooms as well. You can tell which department gets the most funding from alumni here too which i've always found amusing. But in all i think i like it here. The administration in general sucks and i have to drive forever but i like it here. The classes seem interesting and much more specific to the major and how to relate the information with our actual future jobs. I don't know but its growing on me. That or i've totally come to the realization that i need to accept things how they are now.

Potty time!

2008-05-20T21:42:00.002-04:00

So yay! Since saturday morning j has successfully gone number one and two in his elmo potty! And not just once. Several times. He's too funny too bc when u sit him he reaches over for some reading material. Now we have to consistently give going potty a name or a sign he understands and more importantly one that we understand until he can go and sit on it himself i guess. Along with this we should be more consistent with our attempts with a goal of dry diapers in between potty breaks.

Identity Formartion

2008-05-18T10:40:00.002-04:00

"Although we cannot change the past, what we want out of the future, along with our motivation to achieve what we want, is more important (than our past experienes) in determining what our future will be" (Zastrow, 62)

Most Important Issues:

1. What kidn of person do you want to be?

2. What do you want out of life?

3. Who are you?

These are considered the most important issues, and should be answered in order to know where life is leading you, to be successful at achieving an identity.

But they can change as life changes. I'm going to think of my answers an get back to myself i guess, lol.

biography log... a blog

2008-05-16T21:11:00.002-04:00

not a reliable source, at least thats what my professor says. but i guess it depends on what ur writting. for me its a reliable source for my life and my randomness. if i had a cooler phone i might be able to do so more often, but we'll talk about that when summer craziness is done. grrr.

so on another random side note. i was very down not to long ago, u might say its dumb, but it wasnt to me. i had been wanting andplanning J's 1st bday at the magic kingdom forever, and now thanks to summer classes, i cant. well we're still going, but its not the same, i wont be at the magic kingdom on his birthday! in fact, nothing fun at all, just driving back home early ass, so i can make my 1:15 class. BOOOOO really. aside from this school just seems overwhelming, and im crossing my fingers that 9 credits the first 6 weeks and work wont totally fail on me! i also, had been so proud, my nails had gotten so pretty and long (yes my real nails!!) and then with bs from school and life and work, they are gone, nill. nothing is left. totally aggravating, bc i thought id kicked one of my bad habits out along with this over-rated thing called love. bc yes its true finally thats done, at least as much as i believe so, now its more on family preservation and the fact that it was someone i cared about, but love, like b4 no, definitely not. and it seemed to be working well (at least for almost 3-4 weeks) THATS a lot, in my random brain/life.

so yes like 22 more days till our disney vacation, till J turns 1 and till my nursing days (aka bfeeding days) are over. I know some people do it for like years, but i had my goal set on 1 year and im reaching it! and as much as i would not mind pumping and having milk, my milk for him in the fridge when he wants it, in like cereal, etc... having the actual milk is starting to be a problem. its due to me not having lunch breaks at work, so i missed pumping a lot, and my body just got used to missing out on that mid-day milk supply i guess. then when id work at night the same thing. id try to pump when i could, but less and less milk comes out when i try. still i feed him mainly at night, but i doubt that will last much longer. anyways back to me being done with nursing, means yay for real bras!!! lol sounds stupid, but u try the nursing bras, they are lame, not cute and yeah theres no such thing as strapless (not even skinny strapped ones), but im hoping once im done breastfeeding my wierd hormones will be finally gone. im tired of crying over every little thing. i miss the bitchy me! that me was fun! and happy =] But i doubt i can go back to that me... now im a mom and theres this like motherly side of me thats corny and sappy and its here to stay. i havent decided how i feel about that yet. ill keep u posted.

so on a huge switch of topics! it was teacher appreciation week. i didnt even know that existed! and it was super cute. i got lots of things from my parents and kids, from flowers, to snacks (sounds wierd, but definitely usefull!), to smelly stuff, and gardening things. but honestly my favorite day was today, friday. it was im guessing thank u card day. and some of the parents wrote the sweetest things! (and yes here come those lame hormones AGAIN) but as i read them i cried. they really do like me, and thats like a major approval! yeah i hope my boss and my peers like the work i do, and that i do it right, but i work for the kids and if they're happy and if their parents too, that means i did a great job!!!

ok so bed time, i now have a weekend off, so its park/pool time with me and j, and then nap time for j which means essay time for la MAMA, aka: me! good night!

betty la fea

2008-05-16T20:35:00.003-04:00

i want to find my gio... no not a sandwhich guy, lol. yes the latin part and the part that he's cute is nice. but he so sweet. he not only likes, LIKES betty but hes such a good friend to her too. hes always like right there at the right time, with horse and carridge, with stealing trophies, lol. idk, random.

i was planning on taking this first weekend off b4 school really got hectic to see if i could ever really travel with J and go up to gainesville, although tania isnt there =[, i even had people cover my shifts at work. I wanted to just be me and J type of thing especially since now with school, most of my time wiht j is him sleeping, or me annoyed, tired, or sad, or worse with a million and one things going through my head. but nope, bc someone wouldnt pick up their phone and i need to get something from him, plus it was like a back-up incase J was crying too much, i needed to know if he could meet up where i was and drive either up or down, plus if i got up there, i think hed want to see his son. idk why i try random things. if only i was this persistant and optimistic and or hopeful about other things in life, lol. i really just want it all to end. stupid.

lol i want my gio, someone to be there always for me and make me laugh, and listen to me when something is wrong, a friend type of person. like my mom is there for me, and she always knows when im not close to my best and she tries super hard to be there for me, but instead i dont know, it doesnt seem to help. with david, hes there, but i dont want him burdened with me, bc i know he really cares and will worry himself, and i dont want that. i want those around me to be happy and well. and usually like friends have a way of being there, yet distancing themselves back into their own lives, it hurts less this way i think, idk.

mama

2008-05-11T01:25:00.000-04:00

Happy Mothers Day to all the mommies, and mommies to be!

Jayden discovered the stairs!!

2008-05-10T11:34:00.001-04:00

On the to do list for today..... Buying two baby gates!!

If a picture says 1000 words what's mine saying?

2008-05-09T22:54:00.001-04:00

Today was our mothers day party at discovery and my kids sang wonderfully. Everything looked great. The mommies loved their gifts and some even cried. Lol. I can't laugh too much bc that will be me needing tissues next year when jayden is in barney! I love working with ms debi she's so organized and prepared so everything always goes great. I've learned a lot from her! On a random side note since today was our party we couldn't go looking like our everyday messes well me and my everyday mess lol. So i showered. Didn't have time to straighten my hair so i curled it and put on like eyeliner and mascara and lip gloss. I took a picture of myself and i hated it i look so different than i used to. My smile isn't the same it seems so forced and my eyes look sad. I just look strange. Idk. I was never one to take pics of myself like other girls do so i don't have much to compare but still it looks like a different person i wonder if i'm over analyzing or if thats what others see too?

11 months

2008-05-09T21:15:00.003-04:00

at 11 months, my gordito couldn't be more perfect!

the ville

2008-05-06T16:23:00.002-04:00

The only good thing about gainesville is that since there isn't anything else in that city other than the university when u need to handle something on campus it's right there not a thirty minute drive for them to tell me i have to come back another day. Grrr. But this ish will be worth it whenever i finally finish school. At least thats what i'm hoping.

definition

2008-05-04T02:22:00.002-04:00

surrounded by people, yet lonely.

merriam-webster defines lonely as: being without company and sad from being alone.

whats my definition... i dont know.
but i think now i've resolved something or i have come closer to resolving something i've asked myself many times, "do i miss him or just having someone there?"

He's the reason why i smile.

2008-05-02T23:30:00.001-04:00

It's been over a month since my last real entry. And a long time coming since the last update on life in general. J is soon to be 11 months. He's got 6.5 teeth now. He's a super fast crawler and to think i thought he'd skip that milestone. His favorite thing is to be chased! He also pulls himself up and walls by holding on to things. He's a risk taker and his curiousity gets the best of him so i have a feeling walking will be coming soon!! He's a total chatter box!! I wish i could understand him bc he goes on for a while and he totally seems to be telling you a story with high and low points too. J is also definitely a charmer everywhere we go he loves to smile at people and he's got such a smile people do it back. He waves hi and waves adiÃ³s. He also mimics david with a funny expression which led to j finally clapping! He also sings along and has certain favorite songs! And i think
his motto is being happy! Bc he's happy and smiley always! I've been blessed with the best son ever.

45 DAYS

2008-04-24T18:25:00.000-04:00

45 Days till walt disney world and 46 days till J turns 1!!!!!

thanks david for being my push!

Just for u tania! Lol

2008-04-21T14:30:00.001-04:00

Just for u tania! Lol and i will update better soon.

Happy birthday mom!!

2008-04-01T08:32:00.001-04:00

I've always loved my mom for being a great mom and a strong woman but now i love her even more for being the greatest grandma!

Bubbles!

2008-03-31T10:13:00.000-04:00

So it's raining and since we can't go to the pool we brought the pool to us! Well not exactly but we had fun!

Surprise!!

2008-03-27T18:00:00.000-04:00

Ok so i put j in his crib to pull out the outfit for ready for school night and i turn and theres j STANDING!! He's pulled himself up to sit. He's pulled himself up to kneel and he pulled himself up to stand all by himself! But the best thing yet is that he's so excited to have done so! I'm so proud of him!!!

Yum!

2008-03-26T19:44:00.000-04:00

Cooking something serious!!

Its the little things

2008-03-25T13:47:00.000-04:00

I love how J gets a smile from such simple things like he can play peek.a.boo for hours! And genuinely stay laughing nonstop.

Not Your Average Survey

2008-03-25T00:49:00.001-04:00

[gotten from Danielle]

Ten Things You Want To Say To Ten Different People:
1. Why'd things happen the way they did?
2. You are the strongest woman I know, and i hope one day to be half the mom that you are. I love you!
3. You're just the best. Ever. When I need you, even when I don't you just know what to say.
4. SHUT THE FUCK UP! nobody asked you for your millionth and one imput.
5. I wish you guys the best, together you three will make it through.
6. I miss you like woah! and i lubs u long time.
7. My butt needs a floor to lay a butt print on! lol. I miss our many inside jokes, our memories, and i just miss my friend.
8. You'll always be my hero. and i'll always be your little girl.
9. Why'd you leave us. I would've loved for you to meet my son. I know you loved him like u loved me. My mom needs you still.
10. You mean the world to me. Everything changed the moment I knew you were coming. But i know together you and me will make it through. I love you so much. You seriously are my only sunshine =].

Nine Things About Yourself:
1. Colombian.
2. Short.
3. Insecure.
4. A Dork.
5. A child at heart.
6. Not your tipical girl.
7. Jeans = love.
8. Lost.
9. A Mommy.

Eight Ways To Win My Heart:
1. Make me smile.
2. Make me laugh. for real.
3.Make me feel like I am the only one.
4. Make me feel special.
5. The little things count ALOT.
6. Tell me what you like.
7. Make me miss you.
8. Be willing to talk to me, listen to me and open up to me. trust me.

Seven Things That Cross Your Mind A Lot:
1. Jayden
2. KS
3. Medellin
4. School
5. Money
6. My family
7. My future.

Six Things You Wish You Never Did:
1. Met you.
2. Cheated on other people.
3. Fell in love.
4. Lost touch with Blu.
5. Left UF
6. Believed you'd be there forever.

Five Turn Offs:
1. Smoking.
2. Lying.
3. Laziness.
4. No ambition.
5. Visible tattoos.

Four Good Things:
1. Ice Cream.
2. The Park with J on a windy day.
3. Hugs and Kisses.
4. Laughter.

Three Smileys That Describe Your Life:
1. =/
2.=]
3.='{

Two Things You Want To Do Before You Die:
1. Own a house with a pool for J.
2. Finish School.

One Confession:

1. I know I shouldn't, but i miss you.

J's serious face lol.

2008-03-23T10:48:00.001-04:00

I gotta go to work soon. I'd rather not. I'm tired. I think i'm getting sick probably why i feel gross. Last night at work i saw 1 of my little ones from the pre-school he was so surprised and asked if i was still going 2 be in school on monday lol. i saw a girl i used 2 work with back when i was in the field of flowers days lol. i saw this girl who i went 2 school with 2. i kept trying 2 avoid them but really 2 avoid the same conversations... "Did u graduate from uf.... Omg i can't believe u have a baby... u were the last 1 i'd think would have a baby... are u married... (this is usually where their facial expressions change don't people know it shows!) Are u still with the father... Oh... Are you ok.... (now my favorite) you're a strong girl you don't need him anyway (what would they say if we were still together?)" Its the one thing i hate about seeing people. I should make business
cards: Yes i have a son. No the father and i aren't together. why? Ask him... @ WORK.

It's good friday!

2008-03-21T12:29:00.000-04:00

Which means day off for me! And time to play with J!!

2008-03-18T22:29:00.000-04:00

I always wanted J to do stuff soon. But now i want him to slow down! He's so cute. He bats his eyes, he blows kisses, he's mister independent and wants to feed himself no matter if its a granola bar, a piece of chicken, or his cereal with a spoon. Giving high fives saying hi waving bye. He also says hi when you put the phone to his ear and he's learned to dial, text and hang up or switch lines on his father lol he also does it to me . Its not our fault they make the button red! But now j is also standing on his own and trying to walk. Thank God for this clingy phase where he is always reaching out to me, giving me good hugs, and being sad when i leave or else i'd be so sad!

Happy 9 months to jayden!

2008-03-09T09:34:00.000-04:00

Spring forward!!

2008-03-09T00:31:00.000-05:00

Just getting ready to go to bed after a busy day of errands shopping for J bc who else right? Lol. Everything is always for my love. Then work. It was a good day but funny i made exactly what i had spent. My mom wants me to take some days off and go away with j probably to gville. But honestly i'd rather the beach! But with j i can't really lay out and work on my tan so maybe i'll just stay and work my spring break what ever its money. On a side note... Apparently i have a sexy voice lol. I always thought i sounded like a chipmunk who knew that was in lol. But even better lol he thinks i'm sexy lol. Wierd i'd never think of myself as that... But he made my day lol. But i've also noticed i tend to attract the same type of guys... Before that would've been cool bc it would be for fun and when i just partied and stuff. But now as nice as they seem it's not what i need... Sounds shallow
but i have to look out for J i think. Good night.

Good night.

2008-03-07T22:14:00.000-05:00

It's time to drop the crib! One of these days j's going to tumble out!

Its friday! O happy day!!

2008-03-07T17:04:00.001-05:00

I've been late everyday this week! {Except today} and its all j's fault lol. No really it is i wake up on time.... Its the time we spend playing in the morning from tickling him to just singing songs and talking -well him babbling- then brushing our teeth together which by the way he loves! So i'm happy! But now that j's bigger the thing that takes up the most time is saying goodbye! Corny i know but corny is great when i'm a mommy! I give j tons of hugs and kisses. But thats not all... He grabs on tight when i go to leave him and he "talks" to me i of course like a sap turn around and play some more lol. Some days he like fake whines because he knows of course i'll pick him up for more hugs! But who wouldn't he's so loveable and that face! That face he does when he leans on you like he's resting on your shoulder or tummy its so heartbreaking makes me want to call in! He does it to
david too but who wouldn't david is super special with J! Its this loving lean idk how to describe it.

Busy.

2008-03-02T22:42:00.000-05:00

My mom asked me how i felt today when i got off work. I said fine. My feet hurt a little but i'm okay. She asked me again. Then she asked me what was on my mind.... I didn't answer but there's a million things that even contradict each other and others that make no sense. She asked me how i felt about my life right now. I can't really complain i said. It's similar to my old life just less naps. I mean i've always worked i've always had 730 classes so i was up early i've pulled all nighters or just stayed up late having fun so my body.s just got to get used to it again. I'll get rest later when i'm old. I think thats what retirements for. The only thing i don't like is that now my time with j is less. And when i'm with him i'm tired and much easily irritated. I don't know i guess since a was spoiled in being able to be with him every day till he was three months then i still didn't have
school too till he was six months. I'm just scared that now i'm going to miss out more on his life.

boo.

2008-02-22T20:09:00.002-05:00

today reminded me of one of my saddest moments when i was pregnant... after just finding out, i went to this store up in gainesville next to babies r us and stride rite bc through the window i could see cribs and pastel colors. well i walked in and saw the most beautiful cribs and amours and i got brochures andd price sheets and went home all excited. i got home and looked at all the collections. just for the dresser it cost near $1000. i had never been so dissappointed with myself and i was so worried with what my future and my baby's future would bring. i sat in my living room crying hysterically and took all those papers and just ripped them up hoping that awful moment when i felt worthless would just dissappear.
as j is 8 months now he's grown out of his car seat and its time for a new one. today was pay day so i was so excited to go get him one by myself. i went to baby love and honestly i felt like my heart was ripped out and placed in the pit of my stomach. those car seats were the safest ones but there was no way i could afford them. as the salesman was talking i felt so overwhelmed with safety features and details and at the same times so demoralized at realizing i cant get it for j, i just cant afford it. it made me so sad. its unexplainable. this random pain in my stomach and just wanting to cry. ifelt guilty for just having bought lunch yesterday. idk, its stupid david says (thanks to him making me laugh and telling me it'll be ok im getting over my saddness) and imean i understand his point, thats why not everyone can buy couture clothing etc, but it just feels like a suck majorly. it reminds me that i couldnt put j in mommy and me class again as much as i loved it. it reminds me that j doesnt have his own room, it reminds me that everytime i go out and have to buy something i dont even decide if i like something before i look at the price. i just hate it. i hate this feeling. i just hate it! iknow ihave to be positive, things could be worse. but right now i just feel like crying and w/e. bye.

Sippy cups!

2008-02-21T22:13:00.000-05:00

Well i knew there was a reason i subscribed to those parenting magazines lol. Not for the important health and safety articles but for the what's hot section lol jk. But really reading my march edition it showed avent's sippy cup training pack. I love it bc i already use those bottles and they made it so i can just switch the top part and also the attachable handles which he already likes and i won't have to get a bunch of new cups and j is already familiar with the bottles... But my favorite thing is that since i have the avent pump it'll make giving him breastmilk easier bc there will be no need in transfering from one cup to another. This is important to me bc althoug i don't want to nurse past one year if i can i'd like to keep giving him my milk bc of all the nutrients and benefits and antibodies!! Especially since he'll be starting day care. And knock on wood so far just a runny
nose!

So here's life...

2008-02-18T16:23:00.003-05:00

ok quick run through...

J's got a cold... poor little guy has boogers galore! no fever, just BOOGERS, but the worst part is, he doesnt like them wiped when he sees a tissue or wipe, he quickly uses his hands which gets them everywhere. im not sure if im using the aspirator correctly (i even called the pediatrician to ask, lol). so after like 5 days of boogies and breathing issues during feedings and sleep, im going to a pediatrician appt tomorrow (eh if he says all is ok, its another chance to see dr hottie! =] lol jk)

after going to the gi like 2 weeks ago, he had me go get j some lab work done which we did today (o yes its presidents day, so no school/work) he was such a brave little boy. i was expecting them to draw blood from his feet like they have done, but negative, he got blood drawn like grown people do, and his little veins are hard to see through that all that chunk! they did it twice and he was such a trooper. i'd tell him not to look, well i think it was more for me, bc i couldnt look, i already had to hold him down and tight so he wouldnt move. he just kept looking up at the man (who was very nice and talked to j trying to calm him the whole time).

tomorrow we got one more xray and then we wait till our appointment with the GI again to tell me ahta all is fine. i was reading one of the papers he gave me and he has diagnosed hirschsprung disease, i looked it up and im praying thats not it. im also like 60% positive it cant be, bc of the symptoms, J doesnt have them...

J's 8 months now, and hes trying to crawl, but negative he does this rocking motion, is very successful at going backwards and my favorite he does pushups! honestly, he does. it's hillarious!!!! I keep trying to get a picture, but to no avail. Tomorrow when i see the Pediatrician i can ask how i can get j to go forwards. He's eating just fine, he's kinda moved up a little from baby food, he likes pasta, chicken and steak! lol and hes a total pro with cheerios!!!

on his social skills... j's got tons of personality! he's a total goofball, look at him and 85% of the time, hes totally cheesing!!! he's alsao using those lungs greatly with screams and screatches and loud talking ! he knows how to get your attention, he knows how to tap you when he wants something. he still does the excited wrist thing, lol but my new favorite is he knows how to tell u NO by shaking his head (but he laughs everytime i say "como asi q' no".... its adorable for now, but im sure once he really understands the meaning i wont be too happy. lol. j also knows new words, hes got mama down and now even does them in different tones depending on if hes sad, sleepy, or just happy. he says nene, tete (for tetero, which is bottle/milk) este ( i dont know why but my mom has taught him that) and he calls my mom papa, lol, (why again, no clue!).

He's also learned to be clingy and it means more hugs for me when i drop him off to my mom b4 going to work, but my fav is the exited J when i come home. nothing makes me feel better about coming home than that loud excited shriek, then hands going torwards me and the huge grin!

that's j's life in a nutshell, lol

as for me...

im doing well in school, sometimes a little hard to do hw and play with J, he likes the laptop, lol. plus i still cant stand writing essays and speeches, thats totally my kryptonyte. (u wouldnt think it after this LONG ASS POST, lol). schools also fun, we talk a little more in class now. we have interesting debates. the only thing is now im thinking i have to do 2 years down here, id be starting over with my social work major anyways thanks to my school transfer, so, im considering changing majjors. david says do teaching... i dont know its a possibility, but how about marketing, or advertising, or something else totally different, lol. idk, ill keep u and myself posted, lol.

then theres work, cant complain, i love working at dpc! totally. i also got a second job as a "server" now i guess thats pc for waitress, lol, w/e. its okay, the people there seem really nice, plus its like my one chance to see people my age. and its extra money for things like diapers, a new carseat an stroller and o yeah more diapers, and bills, and hopefully by the time thats all done, ill have enough to change up my hair like ive been wanting to, get nails done, bc i think itll look pretty, and hopefully taht will all come b4 i gotta pay for j's preschool enrollment, which is definitely a bitch!!!! he starts in august! he'll be in the barney room!!!! im excited, im all for preschool, he'll only be there a little part of the day and probably not every day, but he'll be with other little monstritos!!!!

things with Him are odd, he's confusing, and im over it. hes stubborn, wont change, wont even try plus he's never leaving gville, and im never going back so its just j and me and its been that way for 8 months and we're good, alive and j is happy =]

also, ive decided, when i get a chance, lol that im going out and looking for new people. i need to. i kinda know what i want, well at least i know what i dont want, lol. ive also started going back to my old physical me, no more maternity clothes for me!! i can fit in some of my ol clothes!!!! so yay! seriously... big YAY!!! plus i must be smiling more, bc i get people smiling at me, and that feels great. i also kinda like the random myspace guys (who are probably just trying to mack, but w/e) saying hi or calling me beautiful, it feels nice, havent gotten that in a while!!!

my next big thing is kinda like one thats distant, but id like to move out. lol. i dk i miss my own home. but at the same time i know its really not feasible, a) its up the ass expensive b) id probably still be at my moms/pops house every day bc a) they help me with J, b) ill probably be over for dinner c)ill get kinda lonely until j can walk and talk d)who would i argue with, lol. so yeah its still on my mind, but for the distant future.

things with the family are... well they are going... lol
mom and me still get on each others nerves, david steps up as the greatest big bro/friend/uncle/godfather EVERY DAY!, and daddy and me are working in the same place, so maybe now he'll talk more, even though hes my boss, lol. and as far as our big plan... its in the works, hopefully we'll get a move on it pronto... for everyone!

lol, yeah so it wasnt that quick of a run through, but super quick considering i kinda smushed the past 2 months in one post, lol... but now what will i talk about tomorrow? lol

Rubber Ducky!!!!!!!!

2008-02-14T20:53:00.003-05:00

So J got a new bathtub... he's kinda outgrown the typical baby tub. It's an inflatible rubber ducky tub and i must say pretty cool!

We showed it to him first and put him in it after blowing it up to give it like a test run... i must admit kinda scared. Then we filled it up and got him ready for bath time. The first like 30 seconds were kinda sketchy, he was holding on to the ends tight as if holding on for dear life....

...but then it was on, and J was all smiles and splashes! We did bath time till he passed the prunny test!

Happy valentine's day!!

2008-02-14T14:10:00.001-05:00

I think this has been my favorite valentines day to date. I honestly really enjoy what i do. I really like working in a preschool! I wished they paid better..... Way better but It's fun. My favorite thing though hands down has got to be a hug from the kids or an i love you miss helena. But even more i love when a parent comes and tells me that their child loves me that they talk about me all the time at home. It makes me feel great! I remember having those teachers that really cared and that i also liked so i'm glad i'm one of those! For valentines day my little ones got me roses both real and chocolate ones. Candy. A fondue kit (which is cool bc i've never had it before) home made cup cakes and cards. To me it's not important what i get. Honestly i just love feeling appreciated and that the parents do really thank us for being with their children. I don't know but today is a happy day!
So hugs and kisses and thank you's and hugs and smiles really do go a long way!!

Good Ridence to the Cross-Eyed Monster!!!

2008-02-10T20:24:00.000-05:00

Yesterday skimming through the channels i got great news from ESPN... SHAQ WAS TRADED!!!! Horray =] i dk why, but i never liked him much... not in O-Town, LA, and def not back here. So now I can gladly go to rooting for the heat... and hoping that they'll pick up the season.

Photo courtesy of D.
@ SAMS club.

and even better J can sport his Wade Jersey and 'represent for a new era for the team' (anonymous).

It's super tuesday!

2008-02-05T08:22:00.001-05:00

Ok so i must give all the credit to david for me to actually know that and even moreso to care! I'm excited about tonight and j is too he'll get to watch it with his tio while i'm in class

Today is the day...

2008-02-04T16:06:00.000-05:00

Waiting for the GI hopefully he'll tell us what's wrong with J's tummy.

We got a dog for the weekend!!!

2008-02-01T07:47:00.000-05:00

J's going to be extatic when he wakes up! He likes dogs, he prefers the fluffy kind u can squish (but not really, bc the dog then runs away) but the Jack Russel Terrier will be just fine.

So let me give u some back history on my story this morning.

I got this teddy bear once from HIM that he won at the fair or something i think while i was pregnant... awww.... cute.... ok w/e... gag. then I've been meaning to put it in the trash bc thats the last thing i had of his, but it was in the attic. We finally took it down when we put the christmas stuff back up. My mom says no dont throw it away, so its been downstairs. But this morning I wake up, and I go take the dog out for a walk, I come in, I see the bag, and I guess Jaxx doesn't like HIM very much either, bc he PEED on it!!!!

I'm seriously LMAO!!!

They do say dogs can smell people and tell if they like them or not... maybe thats why coco kept eating his shoes! jk. Coco actually liked him. But that was a whole different person back then.

Instead of sleeping

2008-01-29T21:41:00.000-05:00

No matter what i can still lay here almost eight months later and watch J sleep jus as i did with amazement when he was at good with me just barely a couple days old. Or as a friend of mind would say... A couple days young. So much goes through my mind as i watch him. J reminds me of my past both good and bad times and people alike. He represents my present and he helps me hope and dream of my future but better yet of his future and what i want for him. For us. Its insane at least to me how he really does mean the world to me.

End of the month and

2008-01-29T08:29:00.001-05:00

End of the month and the police has to fill their quota so they are out everywhere also on motorcycles hiding and in undercover cars!!

Buddy

2008-01-28T19:24:00.000-05:00

He likes to go grocery shopping! He gives me reasons to laugh and i get him diapers lol.

Adventure at the park!

2008-01-26T12:05:00.000-05:00

Nice weather!

Political baby.

2008-01-25T08:34:00.000-05:00

There's some kids who are amazing and know countries and all sorts of things not just the colors and the abc.s and if you've ever seen this kids they're like two! We've been singing the countries to j just bc it soothes him but we think his thing is going to be politics. For a while now david has been watching all the political debater and the primary voting with J and J likes it. He just watcher and babbles during it all. Last night we stayed up to watch the republican debate bc i'm thinking about voting and one of the candidates looks like magneto from x.men. I think his name is paul. Well his last name. I like him lol but nobody else does they barely let him speak. Anyways TGIF!!

Happy Birthday Martin Luther King Jr.

2008-01-21T10:33:00.000-05:00

So no banks opened today, no public schools open today, no DPC open today, so no work for me today =]
JOY
(except for when i think about the winter break we JUST had and um oh yes... BILL$)

So J and I woke up at regular time, holidays mean nothing to him... one day he'll understand the greatness of not only sleeping, but sleeping in! I can only sit and wait.... well not really, it'll be a while for that day.

Today the weather is nice. Not too sunny, not too cold... just right (i feel like Goldi Locks, how lame, lol). So i decided today J and I would venture to the park! We did the usual, the swings, him first on the baby ones then together on the big ones. He loves the baby ones!!! He's such a cheeser.
But today I had a great idea, I brought 3 blankets and I did what I've been wanting to do. I laid them out on the freshly cut grass on the soccer field... and I laid J and me on it with toys. I loved it. and my lil Gordo did too. We played with his toys, I sung songs, he did his scuuting back and the grass felt different under the blankets than carpet or tile do, and I let him touch the grass, he smiled, it's something new. We were there for a while hanging out, the breeze was nice and the sun was out. J started getting sleepy, so we left. Thats when I noticed... grown up baseball players.... hmmm some looked rather tan and my age.... I must go the park again and investigate, but this time maybe not in my UF hoodie. lol.

All smiles for mommy!

2008-01-19T14:59:00.001-05:00

'It too funny'

2008-01-19T14:36:00.000-05:00

Wise words from Cookie Monster

Choo choo

2008-01-17T19:06:00.000-05:00

He gets so excited playing with his train.

[P]oops he did it again... Thankfully!

2008-01-16T21:38:00.000-05:00

So yes poopy diary again... I'm really hoping this will be solved sometime soon... But soon isn't till february 4 hopefully. Anyways on a bright side j went poopy finally today. He was upset before and during he cried horribly its the worst feeling to see him cry and all i can do is hold him and sing to him as he tries to squeeze my shoulder when he's hurting. That's when i'm so thankful j's been healthy and he's growing just fine. I don't know how other mom.s can handle things that life has thrown at them. they must be given super strength bc i get so sad and i'm just dealing with J's constipation issues. And so with this i'm hoping this means a good sleeping night for J which selfishly means a good sleeping night for me too. Hasta maÃ±ana. Maybe.

Sometimes

2008-01-16T21:22:00.001-05:00

Sometimes we are sad sometimes we are stupid sometimes we are weak. Unfortunately for me its those times when we say things we mean but things we should keep to ourselves bc there's always someone who smiles when we are down.

Teeth update!

2008-01-15T18:18:00.000-05:00

They look so little but don't be deceived they hurt! There teeth need to hurry up and come out bc i don't mind the clingyness but i do mind J waking up like every two hours.

J loves his grandma

2008-01-14T21:55:00.000-05:00

And i love my mom too! Good night.

Keepsakes

2008-01-12T19:25:00.000-05:00

As I was getting J's treasure chest out to put in his halloween costume and his christmas shirt, i came across the baby shower cards i kept along with other little momentos. And they mad me cry, bc I'm a sap, I almost cried the other day watching Ugly Betty, lol. Anyways they made cry happy tears to know what great friends I have.

Tania and the Luzes (plus Derwin) planned my baby shower, and i think it went super well. Everything looked beautiful and was planned so well! My mom, brother and aunt drove from here to be with me. My friend Carlie came from NC! Nati and her mom and dad came from CA! and Emely and her mom also trooped it up from here! Then there was Papa Frita, aka Valerie, lol, from Orlando. Also my friends from HS and UF where there, like Gillian, Gaby, Laura, Alana, Mellisa. My Co-Worker (well ex-Co) Vanessa -We share the same birthday- and Janis my ex-roomie. New Friends like AJ, Mike, Twan, Shana, Allison, and her sister Rachel went too. It was a good time, i think. The AC did break, and I was sweating like crazy, but looking back i had a good time, and reading the cards I felt so loved. There were cards from Freshy, Ana, my boss, Ines, my other Bosses, Diana and Dr. Haghighat. Geri -My CoWorker. Family Friends, THe Gellmans, Mayorgas, and Leyvas. My cousin Jackie and her friends Sandra and Katie. Anthony, Felita, and Zadriana, Ms. Gina and Keith's Daddy. So many people that wished us the best, how they hoped for a healthy, happy, strong baby boy, and said that I'd be a good mom or that we'd be good parents. and of course the special messages from them that were thought out and personal with inside jokes and nicknames, lol. I feel so blessed to have been loved by many and how even before J was born they cared about him too.

I love happy times, and happy memories. I'm keeping the baby shower/new baby cards and memoirs from then so I can show J, and tell him about such a happy day!

Thanks Tania, Luz, Luzmary (and Derwin, lol) for planning such a memorable and important day for me, and thank you everyone else for making it very special!!

bed time =] good night.

So much to do....

2008-01-12T08:47:00.000-05:00

ok its saturday, no work, but there's so much to do!!!!

I have homework for both classes. I have to go get the books for both classes first I guess =/ there goes my holiday paycheck... boo!

Then I was planning on printing out J's pictures, or burning them on a CD... I'm so worried they'll delete.

I have to go to the library to return books and to take out new ones, though i might not this week, because, like the title says I have so much to do i think for the rest of my life. lol

Then, there's baby things everywhere. So we have to rearrange the spaces to fit it, so it looks well decent and not like the truth which is that J has invaded the entire house and taken it over!!!!

k this is brief.

Have a good weekend =]

7 months...

2008-01-10T23:02:00.001-05:00

It seems like just last week that j was six months and destroying his half cake lol. But with so many things in the month of december time flew! J is seven months has two teeth got his flu shot sits up makes all sorts of wierd noises and has mastered the cheerio grab lol. Now if if could just poop regularly everything would be great!!

Typing away

2008-01-09T18:58:00.000-05:00

"Nbbbbbbbbbbbb
P=]]r8jj-[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[f=resc
Dxkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk577777777777777777777777777777777777777777x89uh[PPPPPPPPPPER80UUUUUUUUUUUUUU9IKKKKKX MMMMMMMMMJG MERR;]
D
Q;./ NN LLM VBCV MMMMMMMMMMM004DZ;"

Love,

Jayden

Too funny!!

2008-01-07T22:46:00.001-05:00

Yesterday at church J found his fingers and was mesmerized by them playing with them for like 15 minutes. Then all day he was doing it too. Lol. Even talking to them. J cracks me up with something new each day! I love it.

2008-01-07T08:37:00.000-05:00

OMG i just heard on the radio a twelve year old who beat a seventeen month old with a bat. Definitely not getting a young baby sitter. EVER

Going Back

2008-01-07T08:29:00.001-05:00

Back to school and back to work. Work is good... Gives of money lol. And school is good too bc it means me getting closer to finally finishing not so much for me anymore but for j. Plus i get to meet new people! Even if not in class... At least i get to see people on campus.

Love and Happiness

2008-01-06T23:43:00.001-05:00

I have never been happier for my mom and dad... And i'm hoping its just the beginning!! They deserve so much greatness.

Happy 3 Kings Day!!!!

2008-01-06T19:28:00.000-05:00

First I'm super excited, bc thanks to the bestest big bro, i now can print pics!!! but even better... i found out i can print my scrap blog pages. i cant print the as 8x10s though =/ or if i can i havent figured it out. but they still look nice. you should check it out:

It's a Boy!!

I also made some new pages by request:

J's Special Moments

i still have many more to come. i'll let u know. doubt his special moments will be over though... ever.

And you can check out others made by me:

H.

one i should i erase, but w/e i think it came out nice and the pics can always be changed, lol

Then go look at others bc some people do some really cool things.

k. anyways. thanks =}

[[[oh yes, leave me a comment]]]

Bedtime story

2008-01-04T21:14:00.001-05:00

Yay for Gillian!

2008-01-04T16:43:00.001-05:00

I love visitors and so does J! Especially when its a good friend that i still keep in touch with. We went to the same middle school but became friends freshman year of hs... Thats seven years! Gillian went to uf too and thats where we got to be better friends. She graduated! And is now in grad school at UMD on her way for a phd. Very cool! Anyways she's always been great about checking in on us and to definitely make a day where she comes to visit us when she's down in florida! So thanks gillian!!